A wife? Have you ever dream of yourself being someone’s wife?
Marriage. Husband. Children. Growing old together….
So, define me marriage. Here is a good definition I’ve came across,
How lovely is that? You and your husband becoming team? Then when years passes by, your team increases? As you will have children. Or… should i say, childrens? :) And from that moment you two will spend the rest of your life learning about each other, compromising with each other, taking care of each other. And whats important, as the line says it all… “when things blow up, you both will always and ALWAYS figure out way to get it through”. Remember, marriage is about fixing things up rather than throwing whats broken and replace it with a new one. When you are married to someone, you do not just simply give up when things got torn apart. YOU FIX IT. No matter how hard it is, you just have TO FIX IT. Remember why you fight for the relationship at the first place.
So, why am I talking about marriage here? Yes. I found someone. By that term I did not mean it as someone, someone. I mean “someone”. Someone you want to share all of your remaining life. Someone you want to prepare breakfast for. Someone whos shoulder you wanna fall asleep on when you watch late night movie. Someone. And that someone is of course, your potential husband. I finally found him.
I can not really tell you how does it feels like. But one thing I am really sure of is, it is the most beautiful feeling in the world. How someone adore all your flaw, your family, your habit, your past, your dream, everything. IT IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL FEELING IN THE WORLD. One day you wake up and someone texted you “good morning, beautiful”. One day when you two went out for lunch or dinner, he will just look you in your eyes and say “Im so glad I found you.” or “Im proud that you are mine. I wanna tell the whole world that you are mine. I wanna marry you.” There are also times when you two sit silently beside each other and that awkward silent is just so right. And he doesnt mind it at all because hes just… you know, perfectly fit with you. He accept the quiet you and he accept the talkative you. He accept you just the way you are.
So, yes. I found that someone. Someone, for the first time in my life, asked me “will you marry me? will you be my wife?” Remember when in movies, when the guy proposed the girl, the girl went like :O :O :O Yea, I did that. I cant believe someone actually wanna marry me. Right now, to be honest, I have absolutely nothing to offer him. I mean, wait… Let me rephrase that, I have absolutely have nothing to offer for our wedding ceremony. LOL. Yes, Im just a student. Struggling each day to finish my degree next year. Yes, I still have one more year. While he work hard everyday, trying to find another job (other than his current job right now), trying so hard to survive his job so he can marry me. How tiring is that? I cant do it if I were to put in his position :|
So, I promised myself that I will study hard and finish my degree and pursue my master, insyaAllah. I was thinking of finding a job once I complete my degree, I wanna pay him back. I wanna pay him back for spending lots and lots of money for our soon-to-be-wedding-ceremony. I will pay for our electricity bills, water bills, telephone bills, I will make sure my kids grow up soleh and solehah. I promised I will study hard! :)
"No. You dont need to do that. You dont have to think about that. all you need to do is study. And continue your master next year. We are just getting married. We are not planning to have our own kids yet. Once you finish your master then we can start thinking of settling down together, by then we can have our own kids. Dont think too much ok?" -him.
Ya Allah… Thank you so much for sending him to me. Im just…. out of words.
Dear future husband, i love you.
If “till death do us apart” is not long enough, do you wanna be with me forever in Jannah? :)